I have had a lot of jobs. But being a mother is by far the hardest job I have ever had. I wrote an article recently on children’s healthy play dates and I decided I didn’t want to leave us moms out of all the fun. I think it is time we talk about us for once. It’s so important to remember that you’ll take better care of your children when you take better care of yourself no matter how hard it is to get out of your house, day or night.
It is really hard to make time for your girlfriends. especially if you’re feeling guilty because your husband works late and you only get to see him after the kids go to bed, you don’t have money for a sitter, you are tired after a long work day, and the list goes on. I know first hand how hard it is to get out of the door to see my friends. Something always seems to go wrong. Just last week I was on my way out the door for book club and my daughter hurt her wrist. We thought it might be broken so I stayed home until my husband returned from the doctor’s office. She came home with no broken bones and a smile on her face so I was able to sneak out for a couple of hours.
“In a friend you find a second self” by Isabelle Norton
Here are some clubs I love being a part of and I hope this motivates you to start your own, even if it’s just you and your neighbor. I know once you get started you will look forward to that special time every month.
Knitting Club
I cannot tell you how many people (men and women) I have taught to knit. It is a true love of mine. Ever since I was a little girl my family gave homemade Christmas gifts on Christmas Eve. I made my fair share of painted mugs, vases, blankets, photo books and more. I was just married and nannying for a family in Salt Lake City. I saw Liz (the lady who I worked for) knitting all the time and I thought it would be wonderful to learn. She taught me and that holiday I surprised my two year old nephew with a giant baby blue hand-knit hat. It wasn’t the prettiest thing, but I was so proud of myself. And I could tell my family was too.
I loved knitting so much that in 1998 I started a knitting club. We had it once a month and I had it every time at my house. Now 15 years later my knitting club is still going strong but we rotate homes and it has turned into a dinner club. The person who brings dessert is in charge of knitting club the next month at their home. We love to relax and talk about life and just get out of our homes for a couple of hours. Sometimes it is hard getting there but once I am there I am SO happy I went. We all need a break from our everyday life. By enjoying activities you love outside of parenthood you can set an excellent example for your children. My girls both now love to crochet and knit and I am so happy I can teach them.
Book Club
I always came up with the best excuses not to join a book club. Mainly because I honestly didn’t have time to read when my kids were younger. I barely had time to wash my hair. But now that my children are older I decided I had a little extra time to pick up a good read.
My girlfriends Lindsey and Rachel started a book club last year. Lindsey is a writer and I have to admit I was a little intimidated to join her book club. I didn’t want to pick a bad book and embarrass myself, but I joined anyway and I have been able to keep up even with my busy mommy schedule. I honestly forgot how much I love to read and discuss books. I learned quickly that I could save money by not purchasing every book by going to my local library and checking it out.
I know everyone has their own taste in books but here are some of the books we have read.
I hope this helps you to get your book club started
Books
“Austenland” by Shannon Hale
“These Is My Words” by Nancy E. Turner
“Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” by Amy Chua
“Same Kind of Different As Me” by Ron Hall and Denver Moore
“The Fault In Our Stars” by John Green
“Rebecca” by Daphne Du Maurier
“Sarah’s Key” by Tatiana De Rosnay
“The Lost Wife” by Alyson Richman
Lindsey’s next book, Going Vintage will be available this month on Amazon. Our book club is so proud of her.
Hiking or Walking Club
Spring is in the air. Time to get out and get some vitamin D. This trail head is very close to my house. I love that I can get to it easily. Not only is this great for girl time but we also get our excersize in for the day. My friend brought her son along and was pushing her stroller, which was not so easy up the steep trail. A study found that women 32-70 years old who walked 60 minutes, 3 times a week were less tired and depressed. Read more here.
Some Benefits of Hiking and Walking
– Walking or hiking is free. You don’t have to pay for a gym membership.
-Over 150 minutes of walking a week can prevent heart disease and help manage stress
-Walking increases blood flow in the body reducing back and joint pain
– Take a group of friends so you can laugh and chat along the way, it makes the time go by faster and they won’t let you skip out on the fun
-Walking helps you sleep better at night
– Hiking helps with weight control; It burns up to 370 calories an hour (155 lb person)
Simple tips to start your own Mommy Club
1. Find friends with the same interests.
2. Make a schedule and stick with it. Having the same day each month is a reminder to put nothing else on your calendar.
3. Set a realistic time so everyone involved can make it. Book club is later then our knitting club because we eat dinner and we all are hungry around 7.
4. Some of my friends are single mothers or their husbands work late. We don’t want them to pay for sitters so it is easier for them to bring their kids and let them hangout with our kids. This works best if my husband is home to help. Sometimes we get a babysitter at one house and we split the cost so it is cheaper.
5. Try out a few activities and see which you like best for your club
Here are some other Mommy clubs or activities…
-Tennis club
-Running club
-Yoga club
-Cooking classes
-Painting classes
-Service club
-Craft club
-Photography Club
-Game night
-Dinner or movie night
-Lunch dates
As we get busy in our life the first thing we stop doing is hanging out with our friends. The second is forgetting about our talents. It is so fun getting together with a group of women and hearing about each others accomplishments. I for one am so proud of my girlfriends. They have brought so much joy to my life and they are always so supportive.
“The only way to have a friend is to be one” by Ralph Waldo Emerson
When was the last time you did something for yourself and enjoy your friendships and hobbies?
I hope this article helps you find a healthy balance in your life and reminds you that you need to take time for yourself.
What Mommy play dates keep you happy and healthy?
Ashley was born and raised in Boise, Idaho and now lives in Henderson, Nevada. She studied in Germany and created a hand knit hat business in 1998–Mutze by Ashley (meaning hat in German). She is obsessed with her Husband, three daughters, fashion, coconut desserts, and garden gnomes.
Neslerbag says
Great post, Ashley! You have some great ideas! As a mom of five kids and now a grandmother of many looking back, I am so grateful I had some “me” time. I sang in a performing group for over 25 years. A friend and I formed a book club over 20 years ago, and It is still going strong. Thank goodness I have a supportive husband who realized that if Mom was happy, the whole family was happier and away time for moms is essential! We come home being better mothers.
Kristi says
Great ideas! Always looking for more ways to have more balance.
Mikey says
Thanks for the ideas! Love the hiking idea!
angelasasser says
Best club I’ve ever been in? MOVIE CLUB. Four friends, meet once a month, after 9pm and see a movie we’re itching to see. No work, no hassle and always a good time. Thanks for the post!
Shelley says
LOVE this idea!!!
Morgan says
So glad I was a part of your first knitting club…and love the advice on how to start your own club. I might have to start one of these…or maybe find a way to join Angela’s movie club, awesome idea!
Brent says
I like the idea of making up a club for friendly gatherings. ONe of the reasons I have trouble regularly meeting up with friends is that we always seem to be planning things at the last minute. Not only do regular club get-togethers make it easier for friends to reserve time on their calendars, it also makes it easier to coordinate outings with my wife’s schedule.
You should do one of these on clubs that couples can do together.
Audra says
SUCH good ideas. I love the cooking, tennis & photography. Never would have thought of that! Thank you for this excellent post!!! 🙂
Rachel says
This is great advice. I am definitely one of those women who had children and forgot how important it is to remain an interesting and fun loving individual. It took time, but I learned how to make myself a priority more often and I think I have found the perfect balance. Thanks for the reminder of why it is so necessary!
Jorjie says
Love the ideas. A very well know children’s author from Massechusetts just mentioned the book ‘Going Vintage’ to me yesterday… I guess I should pre-order it, sounds so interesting.
Lindsey says
I look forward to book club every month. Discussing literature allows us bond in ways we usually can’t when chasing after kids.
shannan says
i’m inspired! Now to get some ladies together and do something good!
Laura says
I love this. It’s so easy to feel guilty or forget about taking time for youself. I think it’s important for women to improve or discover new talents and spend time with friends. I also believe it helps you be a better mother. Thank you for this great article. There are so many activities that you pointed out that moms can do with friends and still be a good mom!
Sarah says
Great ideas! We have mommy nights but we change what we are doing. One month we might do cooking and another we might go to dinner and another we might do a craft. It is fun to have variety and everyone gets to share different talents.
Libby says
Such a great reminder of the importance of having a life and friends outside of being a mother. I love my girl groups and girlfriends. They mean a lot to me and I love your ideas of things we can do together. Love the book choices and the hiking pictures are very pretty.
Libby says
Such a great reminder of the importance of having a life and friends outside of being a mother. I love my girl groups and girlfriends. They mean a lot to me and I love your ideas of things we can do together. Love the book choices and the hiking pictures are very pretty.
Jenny says
Amen! I love this post and how it made me feel as a mother. Sometimes I read articles that make me feel guilty for not being a better mother and more hands on. This is motivating! I feel that taking “you” time is important for your children and husband to see. Example is everything. I also feel that when you do take time for yourself, you have a greater desire to do all of those great mommy things you’ve been planning to do, but never get around to it. You had some really great ideas! My mind is racing over all the fun clubs I want to start 😉
Rachel says
Great post and reminder of how important it is to make time for yourself and get out of the house to do something fun and social! What wonderful ideas for various clubs to join!
Deanna Sasser says
This was a very inspiring “How Does She”. I also believe that by taking time for yourself you can avoid depression–a very real illness. I loved your ideas. I recently took up knitting and it gives me great satisfaction in my life and also fun gifts to give to friends on their birthdays–everyone should do it. Thanks so much for the great ideas each month. (Try “Edenbrook” for your next book club book. Delightful!!!)
Malanda says
What a great idea. I need to start this. I love your idea about babysitting as well. So really there is no excuse not to start this! Thanks! :))
Stephanie says
Mommy Clubs are critical! I’ve been a member of MOMS Club (Moms Offering Moms Support) in several states. They’re an international organization and I don’t know what I would’ve done without their amazing support. It’s a relief to know that wherever I move, there will most likey be a MOMS club chapter that I can connect with right away. P.S. – fantastic hiking photos!